I recently got Cal's 7-PATH course on CD's.  What a great thing to do for yourself.  I specialize in CD's because of my background in Music Business, and all the time I have spent behind a mixing board recording both my stuff and others, and I have made hypnosis CD's for myself.  I don't know why but listening to your own CD's and somebody elses is very different in terms of effectiveness.

I got Cal's (Calvin Banyan) 5-PATH course a year ago and realized imeadiately that this technique is the best.  I must have watched all 10 DVD's 5 times in the past year and still pick up sublties I missed the last time.  The conscious mind can only do so much!  But because of this style of emotional intergration, I thought I'd give 7-PATH a try.

7-PATH is a well thought out program that litterally loads hypnotic suggestions in your mind like a computer software program.  You simply begin to say the phrase that he teaches you and BOOM your deep into hypnosis and focused on the internal interplay of the conscious and subconscious minds.  I can see scenes clearly and begin to understand things about myself that I would have never been able to address consciously.

Now I'd love to hear from others that make their own CD's and get some feedback about the difference between listening to your own work verses listening to someone elses. 

I have spent this winter working on a book.  I have allways wanted to write a book, and because of the circumstances surrounding this winters acvtivities I found both the time and inspiration to do just that. 

I didn't look for a subject to write on, and this may sound a bit odd, but the subject came to me instead of me finding it.  I'm not sure exactly why but the book just started to form on its own as I began to work from a vision I had many years ago at a time of great depression in my life.

The vision goes something like this...

I was sitting on my couch feeeling the emormous weight of depression pressing down on me as my mind raced through years of mishaps and bad luck.  My most recent reason to feel bad, the passing of my beloved sheepdog Arizona, still gripped my heart as I tried to find blame with myself and others instead of just owning up to the fact that it was simply her time to go. With the pain building inside me and the weight of emotion pressing down on me I snapped, having taken all I could, and gave up. I allowed the forces of oppression to overwhelm me, quiting my own reality by placing my face in my hands and staring in to the blackness.

The blackness enveloped me, and as I surrendered to it I remember asking the question "how did it get this way?"  I found myself questioning god and the universe, as I had so many times before, and in the silence and blackness I began to notice a change in the color of the blackness.  I focused on that blackness stairing deeper and deeper into it, and as I chased this color with my closed eyes, it began to turn into a dark blue.  As I continued to watch it the dark blue began to lighten and it seemed to me that the more I focused on it, the lighter the blueness became.  The dark blue had slowly become a deep royal blue, like the color of the evening sky looking straight up as the sun set in the distance and gave way to the darkness of the comming night.  The blue seemed different than looking at a two dimentional color, and I realized that I wasn't seeing it anymore, I had instead become part of it.  I was surrounded by the blueness on all sides, above and below and within, as I began to float in a feeling of total surrender.

I had forgotten that my head was in my hands and I was sitting in my living room on the couch, as the vision of this deep royal blue pulled me to a place I can still see in my mind, but find it difficult to explain.  As I remaind focused on the blue a stark white doorway appeared be for me.  A doorway with no door, and I walked through it. 

The blueness was still there on the other side of the doorway, but once I passed through my attention moved to what I can only describe as a tub, a rectangular shaped clear aparatus that extended into infinity like a set of railroad tracks disapearing into the distance.  This tub appeared to be about three feet high and three feet across, containing a clear liquid that was stagnent and still. 

It was then that I noticed that I was not alone.  Something was with me, like a shadow that I could not see manuvering just out of my vision as if it knew were I was going to look next.  The presents of this being comforted me and promted me to look deeper into the tub without words.  I looked again at the clear fluid and noticed that it contained small spheres like little crystal balls floating or suspended equal distances apart from one anouther.  I looked deeper into them and noticed that something, a visual image of a person was inside the spheres, and then it dawned on me...this is us.

I reached out my hand to touch the sphere nearest to me, but when my finger reached the clear fluid I noticed that it was not a liquid at all, but a gel that was nearly soild. It was giving, pliable, and by touching it I had started a wave that I watched move away from me throughthe tub, and disapearing into the distance.  As the wave made its way into the infinity I had a chance to wonder how far this tub went and how many lives it contained.

I looked away from the tub and back into the blueness.  The other being was no longer present and as I staired into the deepness of the blue I came to understand that it was energy, the source of everything that powered the life force and the experience of reality that was in the tub.  Later I would call this place the room of worlds, but in that moment it was the universe.  This is the real reality, and the tub is the machine that creates the illusion of experience, of reality.  We are in this tub now, powered by the blueness and connected by the gel in a shared awareness of consciousness, never alone, and eternal. 

Then in a moment I was back on my couch with my face in my hands.  The sun peaked through the window, and I got up and walked to the front door still mistified by what had just happened.  I opened the door and looked into the sky, but never again wondered why it is blue.